tabetha

once upon a time, a long time ago, in a place far away…i was 21. when i was 21 i was married, living in a suburb of fort worth, texas. i worked at a cancer treatment center as a unit secretary. i was as full of angst and brood as my 15 year old self could have dreamed of growing up to be.

my best friend was tabetha, a gorgeous, blonde 30-something divorcee who lived off beer, her cats, and getting her nails done. i thought she was absolutely the coolest person on the face of the earth. and she pretty much was.  she drove a red nissan exterra. we talked a lot, drank a lot, then she cried a lot.

after a particularly rough patch with my former husband, who was as far from the coolest person on earth as you could get and still be functional, tab and i had been to our favorite after work, during work, weekend spot. the lone star oyster bar in arlington. i swear i can taste the tap beer in the frosted schooners.

i clearly remember saying to her, “isn’t it crazy how fitting lyrics from songs that were written forever ago are? that song, that reo speedwagon “time for me to fly”…i mean, that’s my life, man. that’s my fucking LIFE”.  it was one of the only times i ever said something serious to her that she busted out laughing.

i don’t think about the women we each were at that point very often, because…well, that time in my life is very, very far away from the grown-up me and the life i’ve made for myself. but when i do think about us, i think about our innocence. i think about how we both felt like we were on the cusp of changing the world in our small ways. i know now that we were finding ourselves. that was the biggest point of self-discovery i’ve ever had.

i miss ol’ tabby, a lot. we keep in touch every so often, but ya know.

cheers to you, tabetha…then and now.